curious birds: raise your hand, raise your hands if you're sure

you thought this would be a post about deodorant, didn't you? you're singing that song in your head now, aren't you? what's that you say? you don't know that little ditty? ok, i admit, i am probably older than most of you. this commercial song was stuck in my head through much of the 80s...i would call that brilliant advertising! confidence, confidence dry and secure!

anyways, what i am posting about today takes a little break from our normal curious birds. now i'm not trying to get all think-y on you, but i think this is an important topic, very close to a fashion blogger's heart....my question for today is, where do you get your confidence from?

i started thinking about this because my son had a soccer practice/game on monday night. as i was driving him there, thinking we were going to be late, he said to me, "mama, it's ok if we're late for the practice part, because i'm really good at soccer." of course i confirmed this, and added a comment that even if you're good, you still need to practice. to which he replied, "no mama, i am really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really good!" this comment made me happy because he has confidence. it also made me realize that very soon, i will have to find that fine line of teaching our kids the difference between confidence and cockiness. for some reason, i think it will be harder with my daughter. i think there is a real social expectation for girls to not be too confident. i'm not saying i agree with this expectation, but i don't want her to not make friends because people think she's stuck up. right now it's cute of her to say things like, "mama, don't i look beautiful?" and "i know you think i am the prettiest four-year old you know.", but that won't always be the case. however, i truly wish that every four-, thirteen-, sixteen- and twenty-year old woman would think that about herself every.single.day. wouldn't that make life so much easier??

i have not always had the best confidence. it really took me until my 30s – having kids and settling into my life – to find my true confidence. and even now i have crappy days where i feel fat, frizzy and frumpy. there are days when i look at pictures of myself on the blog, compared to nora, and think...what am i doing putting side-to-side pictures of myself next to her??? 

but that's not every day. most days, i look in the mirror and think that i am beautiful. and even if i don't look beautiful that day, i still think i am beautiful. i am what i am and that's all that i am ~ah-kuh-kuh-kuh-kuh~. (that's popeye laughing) (what? too young for that, too?) while beauty does come from within, let's admit it, it doesn't hurt to look like a supermodel some days. sometimes good hair or feeling skinny can make your whole day. sometimes finishing a crossword puzzle can make your whole day. and sometimes an ice cream cone can make your whole day. (am i right?)

i hope i'm getting my point across here. i don't want to convey that looks are more important than anything else. but they do have a place in our lives, in our confidence. i don't base my self worth on my looks. i have way more going for me than just my looks. i'm smart and funny (super funny) and i can sing the kenny rogers part of 'islands in the stream' like nobody's business (nora is the dolly to my kenny). having said that, sometimes my confidence can be ruined by a pair of tight jeans. so i'm asking all of you...people who on a daily basis, post photos of yourselves in different outfits. people who share your poems, your thoughts and your fears on an open forum...where does your confidence come from?

did your parents tell you how smart and beautiful you were every day?

(this is me many, many years ago!)

does your husband or wife tell you how wonderful you are?

do your children tell you that they are so lucky to have you in their lives?

does your dog wag his tail every time you walk in the door? (even if you've only been gone for two minutes?)

did you get that promotion that you asked for?

do you just naturally have confidence, knowing how wonderful you are? or, are you faking it, hoping that no one notices? i would love to hear your thoughts.

in the meantime, raise your hands if you're sure!!!

xoxo,
megan bird